Not really a stellar day in our house.

Day two of posting.  Not really a stellar day in our house. Thing #1 has been pretty sick and running a high fever, it is a bit concerning since his normal doctor hasn't been available to see him and we have had to see someone else.  It's tough seeing a doctor you don't know very well and doesn't know your child.  It's also frustrating when the doctor examines your child, but still leaves you with little confidence in what he is telling you is wrong.  The doctor even called this morning to check on him, he gets kudos for that, but Thing #1 is still running a fever and not much better.  Now Thing #2 started running a fever, not as high as #1, but still a fever.  I really hate the in and out of the doctor's office and feeling like my kids are never healthy.  I hate having to put them on antibiotics all the time.  But what do you do?  Let them suffer for longer than needed because I don't want to give them meds?  But are you building up resistance to the meds because you have to use them so often?  I was really hoping that having them home would be better, but I guess I will never be completely free of the germs and illnesses unless I put them in a bubble.  Trust me I am seriously thinking about it at this point.  I guess I may need to reset my expectations.  I know I may seem like I am whining, I know that there are others who have it worse and are worse off, but that doesn't mean that I still don't get frustrated and upset and need to vent about it.

Since the boys weren't feeling great today they didn't sleep to well today.  Which makes for very cranky babies at the end of the day.  Which leads to very frustrated mommy and daddy.  Poor Girlchick, she just wanted toothpaste, poor dad just needed to use the potty, and mom just wanted the boys to stop screaming and nurse.  It makes for a perfect storm that just proves to me again that I am not perfect and I need to try harder and remember to take a deep breath.  I do not like yelling at my daughter, I hate it actually.  I really wish I could stop myself in the moment of being that upset and angry, and take that step back and take the much needed breath and not yell at my child.  But I'm not perfect and I know it is going to happen, I just really wish it happened less.  I do apologize to her, I do always make it a point to do that.  But it doesn't make it any better that I lost my temper and yelled in the first place.

Now I need cake - yes I realize I'm an emotional eater, no need to point out the obvious.  There is a reason my butt is the size of Texas.